Americans Think You Need How Much Money To Get By?!?

How Much Does an American Need to Get By

The beach is free if you live close by

Apparently Americans think a family of four NEEDS $58,000 to get by in today’s world and I think that is outrageous. Why? American’s have lost sight of what is a need versus what is a want. Granted, everyone will strive for nicer versions of needs, but those nicer versions are wants. The base model is the need. People are out of touch.

If I HAD to (and I stress had to because I wouldn’t want to, but I would) and I had a family of four I could get by on a lot less. Would life be perfect, or even partially ideal? No, but we’d survive and I’d provide a decent life for my kids until I could increase my income. So why do American’s these days think they need so much money for a family of four to get by?

Housing

Depending on where you live, housing can be really expensive. Most people want to live in a certain area and generally those areas aren’t always the cheapest. However, if I HAD to get by, I’d move to one of the cheapest places I could find that would get a roof over my family’s head that was somewhat safe.

You probably wouldn’t be able to find a safe area in New York City on a minimum wage job, and I get that. But, if that is the case, WHY ARE YOU STILL IN NEW YORK CITY?! Pick your family up and move to an area with jobs and a lower cost of living. Is it ideal? No, but I’d do it if I had to get by.

With a house you’ll likely have utility bills as well. Do everything you can to keep them as low as possible. Yes, it’d be awesome to keep your house at 72 degrees all year round, but in the sweltering Florida summers it costs a lot of money. Set your thermostat to 78 or 80 degrees or, better yet, keep the AC off all together if you can. Use fans and hang out outside in the shade to keep cool.

Food

Fancy Food Dining Out

No fancy meals at restaurants :(

If you’re struggling to get by, you can’t afford to eat out. Period. I like eating out, it is a nice change of pace, but if I HAD to live on much less, we’d cut out eating out. In fact, we’d cut out some of the more expensive foods at the grocery store.

We wouldn’t be eating gourmet or even what some people consider decent meals at home either. We’d eat a well balanced diet using some of the cheaper foods such as beans, rice and on sale produce. It isn’t ideal, but we’d do what we had to to get by.

Clothing

People like new clothes, and I get that. I prefer purchasing new clothes as well, but I still shop at Goodwill often when I find something I like. The problem is, when I’m struggling to get by, I’m not going to be buying things I like. I’m buying things to fulfill a need, a specific purpose. The clothes at Goodwill are normally more than enough to get by.

If there is a specific job related piece of clothing you need, do the best you can to find it used or on sale. Otherwise, why would you buy any clothing new unless it is a bargain basement price?

Transportation

beater car

I’d drive a beater… if I even owned a car.

You’ll need to get around if you’re trying to get by. You have to get to your job after all! If I was struggling to get by, I definitely wouldn’t have a new car. If I had a car at all, it’d likely be worth less than $5,000 and be almost a decade old. I’d probably try to avoid all of the costs that come with a car, but that isn’t always possible in areas with poor public transportation.

If public transportation is an option, I’d take that. If it was unreliable, I’d try to live closer to work and ride a cheap bicycle I bought in a garage sale or walk to work. If it rains, that sucks… but I’m struggling to get by and that’s my reality.

Cell Phones

This is where the outrage lies. People struggling to get buy shouldn’t have smartphones with data plans unless it is paid for by work or it is a requirement of your decent paying job. Smart phones are not a necessity. In fact, basic cell phones aren’t even a necessity. Prepaid cell phones? Also not a necessity. Believe it or not, people got along just fine before cell phones existed and you can too. If I was struggling to get by, a land-line or a cheaper prepaid phone would be my phone of choice.

TV and Cable

sweet flatscreen tv

No sweet flatscreen TV for me

Another thing you shouldn’t have if you’re truly struggling? A flat screen HDTV. Wait… how about any TV? And there is no way you should have cable. What value does TV or cable have other than entertainment? Not much for most people. If I were struggling to get by, I wouldn’t have either one. It’d suck, but I’m struggling, not living a life of luxury and entertainment.

Computers

What about computers? If you’re using it to better you situation I could see the argument for one, but I wouldn’t be paying for a high end one. I’d get the cheapest computer possible that fulfills my need to better myself to make more money. If possible, I’d avoid paying for internet by using free WiFi at local businesses. It isn’t a long term solution, but until I’m not struggling anymore, I’d do it if I HAD to.

Gifts

no gifts for christmas

No Christmas gifts this year :(

Giving gifts is not something you do if you’re struggling to get by. Giving gifts is a nice gesture, but many people have grown to expect them which kind of defeats the purpose. I’d love to be able to give my kids Christmas presents, but if I’m struggling to get by, that isn’t an option. Sorry kids!

Even Pets

If I was TRULY struggling and I absolutely HAD to, I wouldn’t get any pets and any of my current pets would find a better home. Pets are EXPENSIVE! Hopefully you’d have a relative that could keep them until things got better, but if I couldn’t afford pets I’m sure there are plenty of people that would be able to take better care of them than I could. After all, I’d be struggling and be pulling any strings possible just to get by.

Scraping By Is Not a Fun Reality

Just barely getting by would be an absolutely horrible reality and I’m lucky that I haven’t ever had to be in that situation. If I was, I’d be doing everything I could to get above just getting by. I’d be working my butt off and finding a way to learn the skills to get a better paying job and move up. However, until I started moving up, I’d be focusing on my needs while I was struggling to get by… not what American’s think they need today.

What do you think an average American family of four needs to get by. I’m not talking about the wants, I’m talking about the needs to live and provide for your family on a basic level? Do you think some of my assumptions are outrageous? If so, call me out! I want to know your opinion!

Should The Parents or The Couple Pay For a Wedding?

who should pay for a wedding

Today we welcome our regular Tuesday contributor, Catherine Alford!

In the past, the bride’s family used to pick up the tab for her wedding. However, many couples today are paying part or all of their own way to wedded bliss. This is due to a combination of people getting married later in life and the exorbitant costs of weddings, which might require some to split the bill with their parents.

That being said, who do you think should be the ones to pay for the ceremony and reception? Should it be the parents or should it be the couple?

Who Paid For My Wedding?

My parents paid for my wedding. I was only 22 years old when I got married, and I was only one semester into graduate school making a very small stipend. My (future) husband had just started a new job, and we definitely didn’t have the funds to pay for our own wedding.

Maybe it was the deep south culture or maybe it was just our age, but there was no question that my parents would be paying for my wedding. This was something they had mentioned on and off since I was a child. My mom even told me that she’d only pay for my wedding if I graduated from college, and I, of course, made sure that I did (for more reasons than just that!)

My husband and I did pay for our own honeymoon, but that was only a small fraction of the cost of our wedding. His parents paid for the rehearsal dinner and the flowers. My family took care of the rest. Our wedding was beautiful, and I know that it would not have been nearly as nice had I paid for it myself.

However, if I was getting married today at 26 years old with a healthy savings account and a good job, I would certainly have offered to pay for part of it. Maybe I would have offered to pay for the alcohol tab, the invitations, or my dress. I still would not be able to pay for the whole thing, but I would have likely offered to do something to help my parents out.

Of course, all of this would be a little easier if the cost for weddings weren’t so marked up or the idea of an expensive wedding weren’t so pervasive in our culture. Now, TV shows promoting brides buying $5,000 dresses as if it’s no big deal make everyone feel as though they “deserve” something out of a fairytale.

Many more levelheaded people would argue that a wedding is just a day like any other, a simple symbol of the beginning of your marriage. Perhaps the thousands of dollars people spend on their wedding would be better suited towards a down payment on a house or another investment.

All I can say is that I’m grateful for my parents’ generosity, and I hope that if my husband and I have a daughter one day, we can help her pay for her wedding.

I do realize that couples have their own opinions and ideas of how the process should work, so please share your opinions of who should pay for what in the comment section below.

**Lance’s Two Cents** As you all know from the wedding posts my fiancee, Tori, has posted, we’re paying for almost all of our wedding costs out of our pocket. We’re just having a small frugal wedding, but a big party isn’t that important to us. However, if our parents could afford a blowout party… maybe we would have taken them up on it? We’ll never know…

Image by: SimonShaw Edited by: Tori

We Cancelled Our $50 Wedding Reception Venue For a Better Deal

Frugal Wedding Reception Venue Hey again Money Life and More readers! It’s Tori again and I’m stoked to be sharing another post in my wedding planning series! I have decided I will be writing one post every week up through the wedding so make sure to check back next week for another post.

To give you a little more background on the wedding plans, we are having a DIY morning shabby chic garden wedding. We’re having a brunch reception, no bridal party and we’ve only invited family (with the exception of two of my friends). The best part is, we’re going to put it all together for under $3,000. After spending more than I wanted on my wedding dress, I had to figure out how I was going to make up for that unexpected cost of almost $400, plus whatever alterations are going to cost.

The Original Frugal Wedding Reception Plan

As Lance wrote a while ago, we chose to have the ceremony at a frugal wedding venue, a local park, and the reception at community center in the town neighboring ours. The community center was only $50 to rent from 8 am through 11 pm. It included more than enough tables and chairs, a full kitchen, bathrooms, and was located right on the bay.

As fantastic of a deal this was, I soon cancelled the reservation. You all are probably thinking how crazy I am for cancelling such an amazing space that cost almost nothing! How could I possibly find a better deal? Well here is how!

I couldn’t figure out how the heck I was going to get brunch food all set up and ready, much less keep it warm, at the reception site which is about a 30 min drive from the ceremony site. We would need food, serve-ware,  dishes, utensils, plus what ever else we would need, in addition to someone willing to clean it all up. I called my mom stressing about this and asking how I would be able to do this without hiring a full service catering company, which of course would completely blow my budget.

Our New Wedding Reception Venue at a Lower Overall Price

Mom to the rescue, with the perfect answer as always! She suggested calling a local restaurant, The Egg and I, to see if I would be able to reserve their private meeting room. Sure enough, after speaking with the owner, he allowed us to reserve the room FREE OF CHARGE! Wooo hooo!

All we had to do was pay for the food and normal gratuity. Better yet, there is a flat screen television with a sound system, and is allowing us to decorate with minimal restrictions! Because we are having under 25 guests, we calculated that all of the food including gratuity should be right around $300. I think this is a pretty dang good deal if you ask me! Plus no clean up and very little stress!

So now we have the dress, and both venues taken care of, it is on to booking the officiate, and figuring out DIY decorations.

Total Wedding Cost So Far: $1,295

Venue: $100    Dresses: $895   Reception: $300

Here is a lineup, in no particular order, of upcoming post topics for this series.

  • Pinterest Inspired Crafts
  • DIY Ceremony Decorations
  • After Ceremony/Pre Reception Refreshments
  • Finding the Best Deals on Reception Décor
  • How to Make Your Own Wedding Invitations
  • Wedding Registry Tips
  • How to Find a Great Photographer At Reasonable Price
  • Alternatives to Fresh Flower Bouquets
  • How and Why We’re Making Our Cake
  • Other Random Wedding Stuff!

Do you think our new venue is a better idea than the original? Are there any particular topics that you’re really looking forward to? Leave a comment so I can tailor future posts to what you want to know!

Why I Work Instead of Watching TV

watching tv I want to introduce everyone to Catherine Alford, our first regular contributor to Money Life and More! She’s pretty awesome and I’m sure you’ll love her stuff. Here is her first post!

I don’t want to come across as a “TV hater” in this post, because everyone knows that Modern Family + a glass of wine could cause me to waste about 5 hours straight (must I always mention wine?) However, in the past few years, I’ve almost completely weaned off of watching TV, and here’s why:

TV Costs Too Much

The first time I cancelled my TV was because I was trying to cut expenses. My husband had just quit his job and started school, and I really didn’t need to spend the $50 or so to keep it. I admit that it was kind of boring at first. After all, my entire Saturdays used to be spent watching one HGTV show after another. However, I gradually got used to my life without it, and eventually I didn’t miss it at all.

TV Makes You Lazy

When we had a nice TV, I admit that my husband and I often ate dinner in front of it. This didn’t do wonders for our physiques, and it definitely didn’t help us connect at the end of the day. Instead of talking to each other and catching up, we were wondering what type of cake Cake Boss would create next, and (gasp!) would the cake actually make it into New York City or would it smash into a million pieces? Don’t let lazy take over your life!

Turning the TV off gave me back hours in the day and forced me to be more active and find interests elsewhere.

TV Makes You Want Too Much Stuff

TV stars and reality shows definitely don’t show the world as it really is. So, when movie stars grace my screen dripping in diamonds, it always makes want more “stuff.” Additionally, when The Bachelor drops down onto one perfect knee and proposes after just returning from a trip around the world, it made my own romance of movie dates seem kind of lame.

I know it’s not logical to feel that way, but that’s the effect that TV had on me. So, without all those distractions or influences from the world, I am definitely more appreciative of what I have.

TV Makes You Unproductive

Sitting in front of the TV is easy and mind numbing. When you have one, you don’t have to be productive. It’s much easier to tell yourself, “I’m tired. I deserve to watch this show.” So, you get very little accomplished in the evenings.

That’s Why I Work

Now, instead of spending time watching TV after work, I instead work on my personal finance staff writing business. Instead of flipping endlessly through channels, I’m tweeting with my blog friends, getting posts ready for the next day, and pushing myself to make more income from my website than I do from my day job.

Ever since I started working instead of watching TV, I feel more productive, more connected to the world, and more motivated than ever. I also have more time to do things that are healthier for me, like taking a jog down to the beach and spending quality time with my hubs.

In fact, there’s a whole world out there people who are also using their downtime to succeed in big ways. I just had to turn off the screen to realize it.

Do you currently watch a lot of TV or are you a TV-free household?

**Lance’s Thoughts** I do probably watch too much TV but it is our main source of entertainment. We could probably cut back a bit, but we do enjoy our TV shows… That’s why I’ve made it known I won’t be cutting the cable cord anytime soon! 

photo by: roxeteer

Saving Money On Weddings: If It Sounds Too Good To Be True…

AdvertisedTooGoodToBeTrueDress

The Dress as Advertised

Hi Money life and More readers! I am Tori, Lance’s other half and the behind the scenes editor of this awesome blog! (Lance: Her words… not mine!) As Lance mentioned, we got engaged back in February of this year. We have set a date and started the wedding planning process but Lance isn’t a huge fan of wedding planning! So, Lance and I decided that it would be fun to swap roles for a bit and I would write a series of posts about our frugal wedding planning escapades!

The “Proper Order” of Wedding Planning

As our family, friends, and the media tell us, there is a particular order that you must follow when beginning the wedding planning process. We have already set a date and time as well as the frugal wedding ceremony and reception venues. The next thing to do right away was to get a beautiful dress for a “wear it just once” type of price. Unfortunately in the small town we live in, there weren’t many options for bridal salons without having to travel a minimum of two hours. I was not thrilled with the idea of traveling to buy a dress, and then traveling to attend multiple fitting appointments. So what do we do these days? Buy online! That’s right, I bought my wedding gown online for a great “wear it once” price of $208! And even better, for $15 more they tailored it to my exact measurements I sent them per their instructions. How awesome is that?! I was so proud of myself for saving lots of money and getting a fabulous wedding dress! About 3 weeks after placing my order my dress arrived at my future mother in law’s house! Deep in my gut I could tell something was not quite right when she called and told me it had arrived, but in a small box…..

Convincing Myself to Like the Dress

That afternoon I went to see my dress for the first time! As soon as I saw it my stomach balled up in knots, but my mother always told me, never judge it till you put it on. I put it on alone and looked into the full length mirror. I hated it. I wanted to cry, for days…. I tried to convince myself to like the dress, make a small alteration here and there, and maybe lose a bit of weight. But it was truly awful. It barely resembled the picture advertised, did not fit, and the quality was less than adequate. For the next few days I told my family I liked it, but in reality I hated myself for falling for such a classic mistake. I have always been cautious about situations like these and normally succeed in not falling in the trap.

So What Now?

The Too Good To Be True Dress

The Actual Dress I Received

After a few days of feeling sick to my stomach over it, I knew I had to find a new dress and tell my family. I called my mom first and she told me, “You don’t want to wear a wedding dress you don’t feel beautiful in. We will find a way to fix this in the budget”. She was right. As soon as I told her I hated the first dress that I spent $250 (after shipping) on I knew I had to tell Lance. He said the same thing and at least we didn’t learn the lesson on a more expensive online dress. Once he knew, I felt an immense amount of relief and began the new search for a dress! Just a couple days later I bought a new dress that I absolutely LOVE! Yes it is more money that I intended and wanted to spend on a wedding dress ($645), but I felt it was worth it because it made ME feel beautiful. I have also decided to not be mad at myself anymore and just remember the lesson learned. The important thing to note is, despite the dress fiasco, we are still sticking to our original budget. It stinks that I now have $645 less to spend on other parts of the wedding, but the dress was really important to me. If I had a horrendous dress I wouldn’t enjoy my wedding day anywhere near as much because I would be constantly obsessing over how I looked. Looking back, (because hind sight really is 20/20), I figured out what made me let down my guard and fall for this too good to be true trap. Ultimately I was avoiding actually going into the bridal salons and have the “Say yes to the dress” experience because I didn’t have my mom with me. She and my dad are still up in Virginia and it still makes me tear up thinking back to not having her here with me for this experience, but it was a decision I made when moving to Florida.

Total Wedding Cost So Far: $995

Venue: $100    Dresses: $895   Do you have any wedding fiasco stories or did everything go perfectly for you? Did you bust your budget on one part of the wedding and make up for it by cutting somewhere else? Or did you get lucky (or plan well) not run into any problems?